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Original Episode

Wish Upon a Rubian Suit

Wizbits Extreme, Episode WX0100

Aired 7th September, 1999

Summary

Lander is a would-be hotshot pilot in the Dragon Fist Power Armor Mobile Infantry. His teacher, Mordechai, prevents him from taking place in the final field test in order to show him a prototype Rubian Suit, as worn by the experimental Advancer Familiar Dementor Dervmont. Though angered at his teacher for keeping him from becoming a "real" pilot, no sooner does he declare the Rubian suit a "fever dream of a madman" than a gigantic monster attacks, decimating the Dragon Fist Power Armor Mobile Infantrymen. Co-piloting the device with Dementor Dervmont, Lander defeats the monster while simultaneously laying waste to his own hometown. After obliterating all trace of civilized existence, Mordechai suggests Lander find new employ elsewhere. Lander agrees and strides into the sunset, hounded by an angry mob.

Infamous Quote of the Episode

Lander: "Truly, it is the Earth element that is at the center of this universe of combat, and not the Solar Beast Copernicatrac! Also Spracht Landar!"

Notes

The episode is perhaps most famous for being an extended allegory attacking the Copernican model of the solar system.

Cast and Crew

All episodes of Wizbits Extreme were written by Alexi Chandler, as translated by the Peerless Automaton of Translation, a creation of General Defense Dynamics.

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