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Riotous Beaches

Page history last edited by Tim 14 years, 9 months ago

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Riotous Beaches

The Riotous Beaches (more commonly referred to in ELotH:TES canon as the Beaches Riotous) are a swathe of sandy beaches around the Ennumerable Sea, east of The Shield.

The entire beach was transchanted in Life Elemenstor Xuxan Xarandon, probably by accident given the temporal and situational unlikelyhood of it all.

The Beaches Riotous are primarily known for their role in the formation of Blanksword, The Void Blade, whose deadly material was gathered for that fabled crafting from the scattered shards of absolute blackness to be found amid the pebbles of the Beaches Riotous, gathered at great expense and mickle danger by the minions of the Dwarven Forge-King Gragnakas.

The Beaches Riotous are secondarily known for their clamorous pebbles. Upon closer examination of the pebbles, it can be discerned that each small pebble is actually a miniature, malformed, and extremely obese stone soldier. These tiny armies rank and sort themselves by color and number of multicolored flecks, and clash in strife eternal on the shores of the Ennumerable Sea, creating a tiny roar and clamor of battle that can be heard some distance before the beaches themselves.

The pebble-soldiers of the Beaches Riotous guard vengefully the Flecks of Darkness, believing them to be gifts if not avatars of their pebble-God, Massif. The pebble-soldiers attempted to slay many of the dwarves Gragnakas sent to recover the Flecks, but being very small, were unable to do more than inflict small bruises with their stone-hammers on the soles and sides of feet of the dwarves, get into their boots in an awkward manner, and force comparatively unreasonable quantities of grit and dirt under their finger- and toenails, thus making them extremely uncomfortable for the duration of their stay.

One pebble-soldier, Nine-grey-flecks-and-one-pink-one-that-appears-white-when-immersed-in-water, succeeded in using the weapons of the leviathans against them when he bravely sallied forth into the den of the beasts to recover a stolen Fleck-of-Darkness and managed to scald a dwarf severely with a tea-kettle pushed off the range. For this feat, the Grey-Quasi-pink Army erected a statue of Nine-Grey-Flecks above the Beaches riotous, which Nine-Grey-Flecks himself later used to ambush the Purple-With-Flecks-of-Yellow Army, boldly replacing the statue with himself and standing very, very still.

The Beaches Riotous are also a good place to visit if you're looking for a Beach Ball of Speed.

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