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Horse

Page history last edited by Tim 14 years, 9 months ago

Back to Creatures

Horse

Bogyn's Nastiness Rating: -27 (Harmless)

Possibly the most boring, but unappreciated creature in all of Battal. Horses are pretty much everywhere, but nobody really cares about them, and rarely takes the time to speak of them. In fact, for the first three books in the cycle, Tycho Brahe describes them thusly:

"Meaty cars, with hooves instead of wheels. Wassits names? Like a goat, but bigger. Less tasty."

Horses are essentially the animal version of Mundanae or a peasant. They're everywhere in Battal, but everyone just ignores them. However, they are nescessary to move people around in between doing something Epic.

The rare exceptions to the rule all have one thing in common: long and overly poetic names. Eulith in fact, discovered a mathematical equation that proved that the more flowery and long the name of a horse was, the faster and stronger it would be. This theory is best exemplified by Mardrangion's horse Blackshadowbeautystallionflamesilvermisttornadochestnutsea (affectionately nicknamed "Billy"), who was so powerful it once flattened a newly created mountain range with a sonic boom.

It should be noted that that horses are completely and uncontrollably terrified of Vampyres and would "sooner plunge from a cliff" than stay in close proximity to one. This is the reaction of most mounts or beasts of burden, except curiously, the Donkey.

Notable Horses

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