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Ribcage Helmet
First appearance: Broken Stool: Alchemical Boogaloo.
One day while pondering the matters of the heart, ‘Grizzly’ Grumper wandered away from camp to pick wild flowers when he was attacked by a Gore-Orc. During the bloody battle ‘Grizzly’ "hauled the ribcage out of it's body, which he then wore as a hat"
The Ribcage Helmet poses powers that make little sense and seem to change from chapter to chapter. They are collected as follows; values are assigned where understood:
Extra Gory Punch +2
Extra Gory Headbutt +2
Extra Gory Kick +2
Vehement Throttle +2
Vehement Elbow +2
Emo Hairdo +3
Roar with the Flames of War
Charming but Sad Smile +4
Drip with Gore
This passage, taken from Broken Stool: Alchemical Boogaloo, was clearly penned by two separate authors as is reflected in the Ribcage Helmet's unusual powers:
‘Grizzly’ Grumper wondered why none of the young women ever looked at him in that way they seem to reserve for
Bl'ng Chiselchin and the men of the Watch before their village was ruined. Why, even
Sasquilla seemed to heave her bosom at
Sherbert Candydyam a bit more then was decent these days. He wandered away from camp to pick wild flowers, and ponder the matters of the heart some more. He knew he was big, but he was honest and handsome in his own way, someone would like to receive flowers from him. Suddenly a ferocious
Gore-Orc attacked ‘Grizzly!’ He forgot that bullshit as he reached for his dagger, but the
Gore-Orc kicked him in his loins and he dropped the knife so then he elbowed the Orc in the kidney and bit his throat but the Orc punched his eye over and over and then karate chopped him in the face so ‘Grizzly’ just started punching the
Gore-Orc’s vitals until they were pulpy and useless and the rage of the Orc causes him to shriek blood everywhere in the froth of war! ‘Grizzly’ hatched a bloody war plan -griping the creatures chest, he hauled the ribcage out of its body, which he then wore as a hat for the rest of the story, no matter what.
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