Back to Professions

Quasar Rider

Quasar Riders are individuals who bond with a Quasar to become an extremely powerful magical combination. Quasar Riders are usually Zonardians, but in some rare cases, can also be humans or Elves.

Quasars will never accept a Dwarf as a rider, as they find their smell distasteful.

The Beginning

When Zonardia was raised above the waves and the catyclism of the Giant Meteoric Cow avoided, the Zonardians realized that they hadn't brought any toilet paper with them, so would probably need some way to return to the Sickle to pick some up. Unfortunately, although the Zonardians could glide down the surface, once there they had no means of returning.

One day, a Zonardian named Quagon was eating a baby Quasar when he realized that while delicious, the wings of the beast would prove most useful in solving the Zonardian's needs. The entire race had already gone five years of holding in all their excrement, so a solution needed to be found soon.

Quagon collected some Quasar eggs and began raising baby Quasars, breeding them for size, strength, speed, and Jhereg-sneezing ability. This, along with exposure to the radiation of the Star Dragon's Heart, quickly mutated and evolved the Quasars into a powerful species of flying reptiles.

The Bond

The Zonardian's most powerful Borner, Tickle, began to cast magical bonds between pairs of Zonardians and Quasars using a powered up Shared Destiny Gear. The Quasar eggs would only hatch when it was touched by someone it liked. When the Rider touched the Quasar for the first time, the touch would leave a mark - The Hairy Palm in the Rider's favored hand. Thus the Rider and the Quasar would be bonded for life.

Benefits for Humanoids

Through the Bond, humans, Zonardians, and elves gain increased lifespan (which does crap for elves). They also gain increased strength, intelligence, and vision. It also increases the Rider's sorcery abilities.

Benefits for the Quasars

Activating Tickle's spell unlocks latent mutations in Quasars, increasing the power of their Jhereg, their own strength and speed, and granting them psychokinesis that lets them deal with the extra weight of having a passenger, as well as being able to use it to create invisible force fields and move some objects with their minds.

Really Weird Crap

The Quasar will change color to correspond with the sexuality of their Rider. Green for homosexual, purple for heterosexual, and red for bisexual. None of these colors are inherent to wild Quasars. This tidbit of information is very confusing and seems odd, until you remember that A: the Zonardian mythos was originally Fan Fiction, B: Christine-Anne McCaoli was 15 when she wrote this, and C: as a teenage female fanfiction author who spent hours on the internet, McCaoli is no doubt a big fan of El-Slash.

Factions

Two main factioned are featured in the Quasar Riders of Zonardia: the chivalrous and brave Rainbow Wings, and the insane and bloodthirsty Bloodwings.