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Obscene Slug

Page history last edited by Tim 15 years, 11 months ago

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Obscene Slug

Bogyn's Nastiness Rating: 28 (Really Nasty)

The Obscene Slug resides within the back country of Alake'l in a beautiful but arid desert called the Swamp of Despair. Most Obscene Slugs are the size of a large terrier and weigh in the area of thirty pounds, but they would be the first to tell you, "You know how I am about my weight, so you can suckle upon my engorged dolichophallus!"

Contrary to what their name might suggest, Obscene Slugs are actually quite eloquent and are very particular about using correct grammar and terminology. The term "Obscene" in their name refers not to obscene speach but instead to their nature and to the copious amounts of feces they produce on an hourly basis. It may also be used to describe the disproportionate size of their genitals in relation to their bodies. Those viewing the slug's copulative ritual have been known to exclaim, "Did you see the size of that thing?? It's OBSCENE!!"

The Obscene Slug takes great pride in the gargantuan majesty of their nether regions, which, when extended, can be up to six times their body length, and the slugs are known to talk about them frequently and in great volume. A slug takes most pride in its member when it is making fun of its prey and anyone in the general vicinity, saying, "Your phallus is so small I could fit it, and you inside of my own while I pleasure your mother and her sister!" Which is usually followed by the excretion of rank piles of stinking dung.

Ecology

It is this dung that fertilizes the arid dessert ground in which the rather small red beets collected by the citizenship of Hambitshire are found. Without the Obscene Slugs these beets would not grow. Without the rather small red beets the Slaughter Beetles that feed upon them would die, leaving no food for the Swamp of Despair's other inhabitant, the Misnomer. This is especially important to the region's ecosystem because the Obscene Slug feeds exclusively upon the Goddamn Lazy Kids of the Misnomer.

Hunting method

The Obscene Slug has a unique hunting tactic by which it captures and renders unconscience its prey. Although the Obscene Slug does not have any arms, legs, mandibles or digits of any kind, they have no problem hurling their own excrement at their prey by use of their overly large genitalia. This tactic mires the slug's target so that it can get close enough to bludgeon the creature to death with its iron hard tumescence.

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