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Mean Elves

Page history last edited by Tim 15 years, 11 months ago

Back to Races

Mean Elves

One of the noble races of Elves.

Mean Elves just aren't very nice. They live in The Underdeep, which may explain their pissiness, as there are no shortages of bat-mice to try and eat eyes, and the only source of clothing are scraps of leather from under Mount Wor's Quilp-run cow slaught'ry. Finally, they tan dramatically in the absence of light; the net result is that they are pitch-black elves in skimpy leather who have an inkling to kick as much ass as possible.

Despite being bloodthirsty fiends and prone to dying of "Skin Cancer Omega," they've gained a cult following in adult Fan Fiction and in the ELotH: TES - Pen and Paper RPG. Possibly because the majority of Mean Elves ride invisible panthers as steeds, which is admitedly, pretty Awesome.

Also despite dressing like bondage fiends, they live immensely sedate sex lives described as "capable of boring a Puritan to death."

The primary hub of Mean Elf activity is in the massive underground stronghold and capital, Great Gandandersanden, where they are ruled by their immortal queen Queen-Princess Xanzandrinzel.

Vanilla is a fairly common, and very offensive, swear word among Mean Elves.

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